Movie Review: Insidious

Warning! Warning!! Danger! Danger!!

DO NOT SEE THIS MOVIE!

Unless:

a. You love really unbelievably bad horror movies with bad plots, plot holes, and laughable villains.

b. You love laughing at thus said movies.  Or

c. You’re a movie masochist!

From opening credits to the final scene this movie was just plain bad!!Insidious is a horror movie that’s first mistake is taking itself way to seriously. Overly dramatic music, flash bulb effects, Boo moments, and annoying sound effects pretty much round out the bad movie list of unforgivability.

Insidious took way to long to get going. The sequence in the beginning that showed photographs while the names of cast and crew were displayed lasted entirely too long; it was almost a full 20 minutes into the movie before anything even remotely weird/scary happened; and by the time you get to the ghost busters you can’t take anything seriously anymore.

I didn’t just think this movie was bad because i’m an English person with a knowledge of story construction- anyone who has seen a good movie, ever, should be able to quickly notice the flaws in the film; although i’ll admit if i had seen this at 7 or 8 it would have been a very scary  night at the cinema and though that is the only group i’d recommend this movie to, i’m against traumatizing your children.

Without giving too much away i’ll say that there very was little suspense to the film it pretty much put all its cards on the table during the typical “explanation” scene, every other “twist” was predictable within the first ten minutes. Two of the child characters completely disappear, their whereabouts unexplained (to my knowledge) rendering the scenes with them unnecessary to the plot (except to excite some cheap thrills for the kiddies), and it used its title in the dialogue (big blaring sign of a bad decision in movie making).  Even the end, which i’ll give credit for leaving an opening for a most likely equally bad sequel, was predictable and a perfectly bad end to an unsatisfying movie.

I think the worst part is that it took a somewhat interesting idea and didn’t use it to it’s full potential.

Now, most bad movies, even ones as horrible as this one, have some redeeming qualities. This one had very few. In deed this was a original idea, and by original i mean not a remake, book, comic, sequel, prequel etc etc. You have to give credit for trying in this new Hollywood movie making climate. The main male lead is hot as is his big eyed co-star. The acting could be better but it’s a solid b-, best actor seemed to be the terrified 2 year old. The effects were realistic and the other worldly scenes held up decently to my “over CGI or underwhelming” test. The editing was good and once the action finally started, as bad as it was, it kept a good pace. Finally, the main “Bad guy” was pretty good. If your going to show the thing that goes bump in the night it better bump and this one did an alright job of that. If i saw him in my bedroom in the dark in the middle of the night i’d scream.

So, if your looking for a movie to see in theaters DO NOT PAY for this film! I stress this- even for a movie laugh its not worth paying for. (Thank God i caught the matinee).  But if it comes on tv and your extremely bored and nothing else is on and your girlfriend/boyfriend doesn’t want to fool around and your internet is down and you don’t have any books that demand your attention and there is no one you want to talk to on the phone and you look at it as a comedy horror rather than a real horror than you might be able to laugh your way through watching this one just once.

This is definitely my good deed of the day.

Happy movie going B-holes

})i({ Thomasa

Advertisements

4 Responses to Movie Review: Insidious

  1. Hsns Sander says:

    Well, I guess you could add incest, scenes where you don’t know where the actors are, is it downtown Montreal or Algeria? I swear this is the last french movie I will see, they just can’t get the plots together and, going back to the Indecent or what is called the mother’s letters at the end were just pathetic

  2. Michael says:

    Rose Byrne is it, so there is a high probability and likelihood that I will see this sooner than later.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: